“It’s that feeling of not having to explain yourself.”
“It’s that feeling of finding your tribe.”
“I felt a lot of shame–I had a lot of shame about things not working out the way I expected.”
These were just a few of the things said and shared at the absolutely lovely quirkyalone/together meetups we had at Cafe La Boheme in San Francisco and at India Restaurant in Providence over the last month.
I’m doing a series of Quirkyalone meetups while I’m in the U.S. from Buenos Aires.
In the Bay Area, women joined us from Modesto, Richmond, Mill Valley, Oakland and San Francisco. One woman traveled two hours to be there.
In Providence, we had people from all over southeastern New England.
Quirkymen: you’re welcome too. This San Francisco meetup happened to be all ladies but in Providence, Rhode Island men joined our meetup.
For those who are new to the concept, Quirkyalone isn’t about being single actually–it’s about staying true to yourself and not settling.
At the SF meetup we really dug into our personal stories. Some women had been married multiple times, some had never lived with a man. It doesn’t matter what your romantic history is, it’s still easy to feel like you’ve done it wrong in some way in this society if you are not fulfilling the “ideal.” No matter what our unique histories are, we have a lot in common to work through to get to a place of inner peace and self-acceptance.
There can be a great feeling of isolation and “what’s wrong with me?” if you haven’t found a partner and all your friends have. Finding community is always key in the journey.
Everyone who came was creative in some way. In San Francisco, we had a former Japanese pop star, a fiction writer, and a singer-songwriter with us at the table. In Providence, we a had a Journey Dance teacher–one of my favorite new dance modalities.
Everyone wants more community–online and off. It’s so important to cut the isolation and meet others who share your values and are in your situation, online and off. There are so many of us grappling with the same questions.
This meetup was a kind of percolation for some ideas I’ve been brainstorming about how I can serve more of you with a quirky online support to help you stay on the path of self-compassion and self-acceptance; to be OK with being single while also being open to relationship; and to nourish your relationship with yourself and your happiness.
I was able to “focus-group” the ideas with the people who came. I got a lot of great feedback from them–so stay tuned.
Laronda and Lisa who came to the Bay Area meetup are taking the reins to organize a BAY AREA quirkyalone/together chapter with some ongoing meetups. They are thinking simple events, from meeting in a cafe to a walk to one member showing others his or her neighborhood.
They’ll share with me what they learn organizing these meetups and later we’ll be able to share those lessons with you.
So two important things . . .
IF YOU ARE IN THE BAY AREA and want to be part of this free BAY AREA meetup group, send an email with your name and email address and I will share your contact info with the organizers Laronda and Lisa.
IF YOU ARE NOT IN THE BAY AREA stay tuned.
Stuff is happening! Stay tuned on the newsletter to find out what comes next. 😉