one step at a time

I met Christine at a tango festival. I had seen her around at the milongas in Buenos Aires. We had never spoken. She seemed nice but unassuming, glasses, hair pulled back in a ponytail, kind of meek.

One night while we were riding a bus to a milonga (a place where we dance tango) she told me her story. Christine is Swiss, in her late 30s. “I worked as a nurse and then a nurse manager for 18 years but I really didn’t like it. I hated it.” She kept expecting to meet the guy, that she would buy a house with him and get married and do all that stuff in her thirties. At a certain point, she decided to just up and go; to come in Buenos Aires to dance tango.

“My friends looked at me like I was crazy when I told them I was going to quit,” she told me. “What are you going to do next? You need to know what you’re going to do next before you quit.”

“It’s done,” she told them. “I already quit.” She had this great impish smile on her face when she told me that. This woman is not meek, I realized.

“It was really hard to make that choice,” she said, “because I was surrounded by people who thought I was nuts.” The Swiss are fanatical about planning, she said. (Just like Americans.)

Christine told me later it was so nice to meet me because she could see that I was also following this path and it made me her feel less alone. Through our lived experience, we have come to share a point of view.

Just take one step

The way Christine is living, and the way I’m living, is evidence that you don’t have the have the whole plan in mind for your life. You can just take one step toward what you want and figure it out as you go along.

You could make excel spreadsheets forever planning your budget, the ideal scenario, where you will find your partner,and so on. But often you just need to take a step toward something that makes you feel alive.

In our case, that impulse was coming to Buenos Aires to dance tango. That could be anything for you. It doesn’t necessarily mean traveling or leaving home. You just have to take a step, and then keep taking another step, and another one, and figure out more as you go along. That’s been my experience with pretty much everything I have done: my magazine To-Do List, my books, my travels, the web company I co-founded, and becoming a coach. I never had a grand plan in mind, I just took one step after the next, and I could intuitively feel that the energy would be in the steps I was excited–if also scared–to take.

As comforting and secure as it might be to have a plan, I have found that taking an intuitive, passion-filled step is more important. I’ve watched the same thing happen with my coaching clients. They come to me burned out by jobs they no longer wanted. They just have to tune into something that actually gives them passion and excitement. They take one step, and then another. And then another. A cascade of unexpected things happen.

Christine will go back tomorrow to Switzerland soon after her three and a half months in Buenos Aires. She is feeling okay with it. She extended her time here by two weeks and now she feels ready to go, to see what happens when she integrates what she has learned here into life at home. She says she will look for work outside the hospital since she didn’t like working in a hospital. She may take a Traditional Chinese Medicine course. “I want to mix it up,” she says. She hopes to find her husband upon arrival. She laughed at the idea of showing up back in Switzerland and saying, “I’m ready. Are you?”

Maybe that is the way. When you get very clear and are turned on you’re more likely to attract what you want.

I’m excited to find out what comes next for her.

Bottom line advice
Take the one step toward whatever makes you bright. If you are contemplating taking a step, let me know what it is in the comments.

P.S. I am absolutely loving the group in the first session of GetQuirky. I think I may change the name to Go Forth and GetQuirky, that’s what we all say to each other when we end one of our weekly calls. We’re having so much fun and going deep at the same time, exploring what it means to love all of who we are, “flaws” and quirks and all. The next session will be in July. If you want to become more radiant by accepting the quirkyness of yourself and others, sign up for the early information list here.

Like this? Share it! Sign up for my mailing list to get weekly inspiration for your quirky life. To get even more inspired, read one of my books Quirkyalone or To-Do List and join us for the next session of my class GetQuirky which starts in July 2013.

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These walls were created as part of an international street art festival in Buenos Aires. They are always changing and getting painted over. Wall space is a hot commodity.

If you spend any time at all in Buenos Aires, you will notice that fantastical street art is everywhere.

The best touristy thing I have done in Buenos Aires–and I generally do not like touristy things–is this Mundo Graffiti street art tour. My mom and I went together when she came to visit.

It’s fascinating to think about why the people of Buenos Aires have such a permissive attitude toward street art and why these artists paint for free, usually buying the paint themselves. Some start as taggers but they grow up to be working artists who also paint and/or do design work. The walls are just another canvas.

One theory is that after a dictatorship people value free expression and take a laissez-faire attittude toward street art.

Most street art is not political but this wall was commissioned by homeowners to show their support for Cristina, Argentina’s current president

But that doesn’t explain everything. There is a lot of street art in Rio too, but not nearly as much as in Buenos Aires. Brazil also suffered a dictatorship. My friend Anonimundo makes street art in Rio and he needs to do it on the down-low in a way that Buenos Aires street artists do not. They can paint in the light of day, and sometimes an admiring business or homeowner will ask an artist to paint their wall. The art, if not the graffiti, is generally gorgeous.

A group of English women expats noticed the street art phenomenon and created this tour (they’re also working on a documentary of the art and artists). Porteños (Buenos Aires residents) don’t necessarily recognize how special their street art scene is. Often it takes an outsider to see something unique about a place and valorize it.

Again, most street art is not political but this piece is. It represents Madres de Plaza de Mayo, an association of Argentine mothers whose children “disappeared” during the Dirty War of the military dictatorship (1976-83)

Next to a bus station in Villa Crespo, don’t miss the Jack Nicholson

This one is a collaborative piece by street artists from around the world who kept adding elements.

Just another corner of art at the street art bar in Palermo Soho Post Street Bar

Like this? Share it! Sign up for my mailing list to get weekly inspiration for your quirky life. To get even more inspired, read one of my books Quirkyalone or To-Do List and join us for the next session of my class GetQuirky which starts in July 2013.

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It’s Lady Gaga singing “Bad Romance,” that song where she goes, RAAA RAAA RAAA AHH AHH AHH. I take another look at the front of the cab and notice a photo of Lady Gaga hanging from the mirror.

“Do you like Lady Gaga?” I ask.

“Love her! Love her.” While we are stopped at a red light, he shows me a tattoo on his forearm of Lady Gaga’s face.

“What do you like about her?” I ask.

“Everything.”

“One thing. Tell me one thing.”

“Her talent. Her creativity.” he points to his head. “Her body. Her ass.” He laughs.

He then pointed to his keychain. A photo of Lady Gaga. Then he showed me his phone. Also a photo of Lady Gaga.

“Did you ever see her live in concert?”

“Yes, of course. I recorded this.” He is playing a concert recording.

In the recording, Lady Gaga starts to talk about standing up for the lesbian, the bi, the gay, the trans. She’s a big gay rights advocate.

“Do you like her?” he asks.

“For me she is a symbol of individuality,” I say. “I like that about her.”

“That too,” he says. “She’s different. She’s for the different ones.”

My cab driver’s dream is to see her in Madison Square Garden. In Lady Gaga’s hometown of Manhattan.

“I have ten t-shirts of Lady Gaga but I’m not wearing any tonight,” he says.

A grown man, probably in his late 40s, totally wild about Lady Gaga, unafraid to make his passion obvious to everyone who steps into his cab.

The world is a wonderful place. When we arrive at my destination, I have a big smile on my face. I love meeting quirky, passionate characters.

P.S. I was also happy because I think of Lady Gaga as an icon of quirky, and I’m getting ready to teach the first session of my course GetQuirky. Registration for GetQuirky closes Friday, April 19. If you want in on this initial run of GetQuirky sign up today! It’s a 30-day creative and reflective journey of quirky through your own life, writing, reflecting, going on adventures. We’re going to have fun, be creative and look at the world from different angles. You’ll get inspiration to shine as your quirky self (just like Lady Gaga does) in a community of like-minded folks.Sign up today and join us! This is Lady Q Sasha Cagen signing off.

Like this? Share it! Sign up for my mailing list to get weekly inspiration for your quirky life. To get even more inspired, read one of my books Quirkyalone or To-Do List and join us for the next session of my class GetQuirky which starts in July 2013.

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quirkywiggling in brazil

The photo above is a very obvious quirkywiggle. Sometimes they can be quite subtle.

A quirkywiggle is my personal dance that that puts me back in touch with the quirky spirit (that is, light, free, accepting of myself and the moment, and joyful). Your quirkywiggle is unique to you. It can be small or large. It can be a shake of the shoulders. A flick of the head. A bounce up and down. It could even be as small as scrunching up your nose.

I asked a friend over Skype chat, What’s yours? He says his looks like “dancing with movements on one leg at a time (giggle). I just lift only one leg and make movements on that leg and my arms.”

What is your quirkywiggle?

The more free we become in our bodies, the more free we become in our minds.

Ellen de Generes is one of my quirkywiggle inspirations. I posted this Ellen dance party video on my Facebook page to talk about the quirkywiggle.

A reader Ian wrote this in response. My theory has always been that dancing (or wiggling) liberates us to be more free. Ian’s story is the reverse. He became more free, and then he suddenly found a desire to dance.

“It’s quite interesting that for me there’s a direct connection between dancing and my ‘discovery’ of quirkyaloneness.

I never used to party, and when dragged out, I was very much a wallflower and refused point-blank to do anything involving dancing. However, after reading the Quirkyalone book and becoming much more comfortable with the idea of who and what I was, my self-confidence rose and the very next social thing I went to, a wedding in fact, I think I was dancing barefoot on the dancefloor most of the evening.

Weird what a bit of self-confidence does!”

Either way, the more comfortable we get with our quirkyness, the more willing we are to dance. Literally. And with life

Quirkywiggles in Everyday Life
You can do the quirkywiggle on the dance floor. But really I’m talking about doing a quirkywiggle in everyday life, whenever you need a little spark, or an interruption of the serious.

I actually have many quirkywiggles. This is a medium-sized, sitting-at-a-cafe one.

A quirkywiggle could be just wagging your finger in the air (something you could do on the sly during a meeting).

I’d love to hear about your quirkywiggle!

P.S. My class GetQuirky starts Monday April 22! I created this class, a 30-day safari of quirky through your own life, because I believe in the power of quirky as a joyful way to increase our self-acceptance. This class will be deep and fun: a playful journey of self-discovery and connecting with open-minded kindred spirits. You will get back in touch with you. You’ll write, reflect, take photos, jump in puddles, and WIGGLE. You’ll get tools and insights to stand with courage in your quirkyness and your unique path through life. Click HERE to find out more.

Registration closes Friday April 19. I hope you will join us in getting quirky!

Like this? Share it! Sign up for my mailing list to get weekly inspiration for your quirky life. To get even more inspired, read one of my books Quirkyalone or To-Do List and join us for the next session of my class GetQuirky which starts in July 2013.

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my feet in a parapente (paragliding) flight in Colombia

Many of you know me as the founder of the quirkyalone movement and the author of Quirkyalone: A Manifesto for Uncompromising Romantics. I am known as the lady who stood up and said, there’s nothing wrong with you if you have been single—even for however many years. Hold out for what you want. It’s better to be single rather than settle. I told Anderson Cooper that even when he snarled at me.

This word quirkyalone is still as relevant today as it was when I created it in 2000. I still believe in it.

A quirkyalone point of view values both the single and partnered paths; at the end of the day the connection and love we feel for ourselves is the most fundamental one.

Going Where the Energy Is
I still love quirkyalone but now I am ready to take my work to a new level of abstraction and use “quirky” as the big idea.

I renamed my personal website Sasha Cagen’s Viva Quirky. I am convening an online course called GetQuirky where we will support each other to walk the quirky path in life to accept ourselves and shine. A friend of mine here in Buenos Aires is calling me Lady Q Sasha and I think I will use that name too. (This friend is helping me develop an online quirkymeter to measure your quirky levels on any given day–stay tuned!)

Why quirky and not quirkyalone? Or Quirkytogether? I’m shaving down to the essential to go even bigger. To encompass more possibilities.

Quirky feels more expansive to me now. I needed new blood. If I have learned anything in this life, it is that you must go where the energy is. The passion. Even if you don’t have a long-term plan for how it is going to turn out, go with where the energy is.

I’m in love with flourishes of individuality in all of us. That’s the love story. I am a quirkymagnet. (I attract quirky people in my social life constantly.) We attract what we love. I want to write and talk and teach about . . . quirkyalone, and also quirkytogether, quirkyparenting, quirkytravel, quirkyyou, quirkysex, quirkysensuality, quirkytango, quirkyanything.

So you will hear from me about all those things as I elaborate my theories, share stories, and offer you courses and experiences to get in touch with the quirky in you.

Permission to be who you are
Quirky is a powerful world. The core value I want to offer you is permission and liberation to be who you are.

The secret weapon of quirky is that it’s a fun and creative path toward what we all want most: self-acceptance and self-love. Self-love is the starting point for every other relationship. And for the best things in life.

I want to help you with the courage to stand in your quirkiness. That’s what we are going to do in my class GetQuirky. Together.

Love,
Lady Q Sasha

Like this? Share it! Sign up for my mailing list to get weekly inspiration for your quirky life. To get even more inspired, read one of my books Quirkyalone or To-Do List and join us for the next session of my class GetQuirky which starts in July 2013.

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TEACHNOW
If you feel a calling to teach (online or off) I highly recommend TeachNow.

We teach what we need to learn. And nothing whips you into shape and makes you more clear than teaching.

Jen Louden (the creatrix of TeachNow) is very down-to-earth, supportive, and full of insights on teaching as a transformative path for your students and for you. I took TeachNow last year to help prepare for teaching my upcoming course GetQuirky and found it extremely valuable. Although I’ve taught writing before for MediaBistro, I really wanted a refresher on how to teach–especially to learn about how to design a course and to feel more confident.

Jen’s offering a free class tomorrow as a sampler on Thursday, April 4 at 10 am Pacific Time. Sign up here and you get an email with the call-in info. You also get access to the TeachNow Library, which has some excellent resources. I may join the call, and if so, hear you there!

CALLING IN THE ONE
Calling in the One is a course that gives you a path toward attracting your soul mate. But really it’s a class about becoming “the one” yourself first.. If you are quirkyalone and prefer to be single rather than settle–and at the same time you do want a partner in your life, the RIGHT puzzle piece to match your puzzle piece–Calling in the One may be helpful for you. It’s really a class for people who want what they call “an evolutionary partnership,” a new style of relationship where both people get to be full partners. Their vision of an “evolutionary partnership” is kindred to my concept of “quirkytogether.”

I did Calling in the One last year and got a ton out of it. Although their tagline says it is about attracting your soul mate in seven weeks, that’s not really the point. It’s really about becoming a friend to yourself in your most vulnerable places and taking a powerful stand for yourself and your visions.

Calling in the One helps you look at your internal blocks to love (most of all the internal blocks you have in loving yourself). It sets you up to be better able to attract the right partner for you because you start to really show up for yourself. If you are like me, you might be a little put off by the pink branding but trust me this is a great class.

Their next class starts April 23. You can sign up and learn more about Calling in the One here.

P.S. You’ll be hearing more about GetQuirky from me soon (my own class!). But as I really do think these are wonderful classes to enrich your life, I wanted to share them with you too!

Like this? Share it! Sign up for my mailing list to get weekly inspiration for your quirky life. To get even more inspired, read one of my books Quirkyalone or To-Do List and join us for the next session of my class GetQuirky which starts in July 2013.

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buenos aires street art (bears getting direct)

What I have learned most from Portenos (Buenos Aires residents) is directness. They are the most direct people I have ever encountered. Not direct in the New York sense (gruff). They are emotionally direct about how they are feeling, unafraid to say everything: the good and the dark. I learn a lot from them. Sometimes their directness bothers me, but often it inspires me because we can all benefit from just saying it more often.

I posted this observation on Facebook and an Estonian friend who lives in Buenos Aires wrote, “I so agree with you, Sasha! Sometimes it [the Porteno directness] is overwhelming and I cannot stand it, but deep inside I admire them for not choosing the ‘right time’ to tell the serious stuff as this time almost never exists. By telling things out sooner than later, we also suffer less in total.”

I’m thinking a lot about directness as I prepare for teaching my upcoming Get Quirky course. What’s the connection between embracing your uniqueness and just saying it? Actually, they they are quite connected.

When you know yourself and own who you are—quirks and all—it’s that much easier to share yourself with others. To be direct. And just say it.

Here is the formula I have discovered:

1. Get quirky—be willing to understand your quirk and own it
2. Be willing to share it
3. Share it
4. Nirvana (well, at least better communication and connection)

I have had a direct experience with this connection and becoming more direct (like the Portenos) lately. I finally understood one of my own quirks in dating or meeting new friends. When I meet up with a new person for the first time, it is much better for me to set a time limit of an hour or an hour and a half. Otherwise I fade and disappear. This is one of my characteristics as a highly sensitive person. I absorb a lot of information and then I need a break.

I had been suffering by going out on three-hour-long meetings and feeling stuck because I thought that’s how it had to be. The other person would notice—Hey, you were there, then you disappeared. It felt icky.

Once I understood my quirk, and then was able to be direct and communicate it, the situation transformed.

I was able to say: I need to meet for just one hour when I meet with someone for the first time. When I shared this information, the other person was glad I had been so direct. He could understand me better. It all started with me getting clear on my own quirky needs.

My course Get Quirky will take you on a journey to get to know your quirky self. When you know yourself better and accept who you are, everything flows a bit easier. You can share who you are with others from a place of self-acceptance. In the big picture, when you respect your own quirky path through life everything flows better too.

You can also have fun with being quirky. Let’s be clear: this course is also about having fun in your daily life being quirky and appreciating the quirks of others.

Get Quirky is a safari of quirky through your own life for 30 days. It will start April 22. It’s going to be deep and magical and it’s going to be fun and totally unique.

Get Quirky will open you up to new discoveries about yourself and spark your creativity. If your daily life is feeling blah, if you feel like you need something new to inspire you and open you up to new discoveries about yourself and life’s possibilities, this class is for you.

Early Bird registration will open soon in the next week. Jump on this list and you will get access to a special early bird registration discount.

I look forward to getting quirky and direct with you!

Sashis (what Porteno friends sometimes call me)

Like this? Share it! Sign up for my mailing list to get weekly inspiration for your quirky life. To get even more inspired, read one of my books Quirkyalone or To-Do List and join us for the next session of my class GetQuirky which starts in July 2013.

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On the street I decided to give Milonga 10 a try which was better.

I took a cab home and when I got in the cab the driver told me he saw me at Cachirulo.

“Disfrutaste?” I asked. “Did you enjoy it?”

“Baile.” he said. “I danced.”

I didn’t dance, I told him. I proceeded to tell him about all the reasons I did not like Cachirulo last night, including the feeling of desperation of waiting to be chosen, how frustrating that can feel. I felt invisible, I said.

“I saw you,” he said.

“Did you see me?” he asked.

“No,” I had to admit. And I wondered if I had even been looking at anyone at all, maybe I just gave up from the start.

Like this? Share it! Sign up for my mailing list to get weekly inspiration for your quirky life. To get even more inspired, read one of my books Quirkyalone or To-Do List and join us for the next session of my class GetQuirky which starts in July 2013.

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street are in buenos aires

“But it’s so random,” I remember, saying with a pained expression on my face, as I sat on the couch across from my therapist.

She looked at me with a warm expression. “Random isn’t necessarily bad,” she said. “I could never tell you what to do with your life. I don’t even know what I should do in my own life. No one can really tell another person what they should do.”

Last year, I was deciding whether to follow an instinct to move to Buenos Aires. We could call it a desire or impulse. Something that really did not make much logical sense in terms of “career,” “money” or “finding a partner” (something I can say finally without ambivalence that I do want). I was actually happy in Oakland. But I felt this instinct and it would not go away.

Learning how to follow an instinct
The instinct took root in my body in 2011 on one of my last days to Buenos Aires during my first trip here. It’s a New Age cliche to say, “listen to your body,” but my body does give me messages. I just felt in my body one day suddenly in the street that I was meant to come back and spend more time in this city. That feeling was a warmth, and I couldn’t quite explain it because there were actually a lot of things I didn’t even like about this city (despite my obsession with tango). But it just seemed clear.

I remember being in San Francisco six months later, when I was struggling with the decision, talking to Santiago, a tango teacher from Argentina. He asked me why I wanted to move to Buenos Aires. “Because I want to.” I told him. I didn’t really have a more clear answer than that. I had a desire. I desire I felt in my body, as much as my mind told me no. My answer “Because I want to” seemed to surprise Santiago. A simple nonpractical desire seemed bold and audacious and at the same time inadequate, too simple. But that is all I had: a persistent instinct.

He laughed and said I would have fun with the men there. “Ah, you will see.” That’s not what it was about. I didn’t come here looking for a bunch of lovers. [My report on the men of Argentina is another story.]

Struggling with the mystery of desire–and conflicting desires
After spending a year at home in Oakland, I bought a plane ticket to go check out living in Buenos Aires. Then I cancelled the ticket. Two months later I bought another ticket. Then I pushed that ticket back by five weeks. This struggle felt so symbolic: I was battling between my desires for being grounded in a home and all the possibilities that could offer and my desires for adventure, and simply to follow an instinct. I was also afraid that in going I would not be available to find a partner and that somehow in going I was going to be too alone, which is always my fear in following an instinct. That I will be too alone.

At the end of the day, I surrendered to the impulse to go.

Conflicting desires are a part of life. There is almost always more than one desire. Learning how to choose is the key.

I suddenly realized, after all the therapy and the booked and cancelled ticket, that if I ignored this instinct, I was ignoring it at the risk of low-grade depression.This impulse to go—as random and nonlogical as it seemed—was what I needed more. Even if I decided to come back and settle down in the Bay Area, I needed to come live in Buenos Aires first. For reasons that were basically mysterious to me.

I decided to be OK with the mystery.

What has happened since in the six months since I have lived in Buenos Aires is a whole other story. I’m not quite ready to sum that up because I’m still living it. But I can say this. I am so glad I listened to that instinct. I always am glad I listen to my instincts. When I don’t listen to them I feel like I am shriveling up and contracting. When I do listen to them I feel like I am coming out on the victorious side of fear. My life feels longer and richer for listening to these instincts. More mysterious, which I have learned that I like. I love the mystery.

Instinct vs rationality
In a rational culture like the United States where you are supposed to have a plan (and a retirement plan) it can feel countercultural to follow a quirky whisper, intuition, or impulse. Especially an instinct that doesn’t fit the norm and doesn’t have a list of rational reasons to support it. It might be OK to follow a random instinct in our twenties and sixties, but not so much in our thirties and forties, the decades of career-building and family-building. These are the times when we are supposed to be nest-egg-building, “on track.”

An instinct is a compass for life to point in interesting directions. Following random instincts can fuel our lives and fill our lives with more unpexpected learning and mystery. The decisions don’t have to be as radical as leaving your life in one country to live in an another. A random instinct can be about feeling into the energy to talk to a stranger, go to a conference, crash a party, read a random book. Random instincts make our lives uniquely our own. When you follow your impulses, no matter where they arise in you, through your body, your heart, your mind, you are taking a stab at creating your life. Mistakes and all.

I struggled to accept the randomness of these instincts. But evidence keeps piling up that following them is worth it. A friend told me recently that her ex-boyfriend judges me. “She just follow the nose of her whims,” he said about me. Maybe that would have bothered me in the past but now . . . well, yes, that’s right. I do follow my whims. And I am proud of my courage to do that.

PS The book I’m working on is actually a much longer epic story of me following my random instincts across Brazil, Colombia, and Argentina, and then back in San Francisco in 2010, and everything I learned about desires, happiness, pleasure, and sensuality. To hear about publication developments, sign up for my mailing list.

PPS We are going to talk about quirky instincts and get practice with following them in my upcoming online course Get Quirky. It will be a 30-day safari of quirky where you will tune into your own quirky instincts and creativity. You won’t have necessarily have to uproot your life like I did. Random instincts come in all sizes, shapes, flavors.

Sign up here for the early notification list and get access to a special discount. Class registration will open soon! I sooooo look forward to getting quirky with you!

Like this? Share it! Sign up for my mailing list to get weekly inspiration for your quirky life. To get even more inspired, read one of my books Quirkyalone or To-Do List and join us for the next session of my class GetQuirky which starts in July 2013.

The post In Praise of Following Random Instincts appeared first on Sasha Cagen's Viva Quirky.

If you didn’t get the chance to read it, the post was a response to a woman who warned that if you don’t have serious relationships in your twenties, you will be at a disadvantage for the rest of your life. I didn’t have a “serious relationship” in my twenties (whatever that means, I’m still not sure to be honest).

Sharing that post with you felt like I was exposing myself. Even though many of you found me via Quirkyalone, I still feel vulnerable sharing things about my life that do not fit the norm.

Which is what I want to talk about: quirky vulnerability.

Many of you may be aware of Brene Brown’s beautiful work on vulnerability, and how sharing our vulnerability is a key to greater intimacy and joy. She writes about showing up authentically as who we really are: “Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it. Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy—the experiences that make us the most vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light.”

My underlying intention in sharing my own quirkiness is always the conversation that results.

In that conversation I find so much light.

I have been so happy reading the comments in response to that post on my own blog and on the Huffington Post. Reading the comments proved to me once again that it’s worth it to be vulnerable. I especially enjoyed reading stories of women who found authentic love later in life and voices like this: “The world is already skewed in favor of couples and families and it can be really difficult to find your own authentic life and voice as it is without someone perpetuating the fear that if you don’t find it in your twenties you’re just OVER, especially since it is NOT TRUE.”

When we share our quirks it gives permission to others to do the same. We become more free.

Sharing our quirkiness (our real unique selves, creativity, points of view, and reflections) is what we are going to do in my upcoming online course Get Quirky. We’re going to talk about singleness and relationships for one week of the course, but more than that, we are going to increase the quirky quotient in our whole lives and get practice being vulnerably quirky with each other.

Get Quirky is a monthlong course. It is going to be a mix of deep reflection and serious fun in appreciating what’s unique about ourselves and in the people and world around us. The intention is to increase our self-acceptance and acceptance of others, our daily sense of fun and wonder, which are just some of the gifts that I think an appreciation of the quirky brings us.

I created Get Quirky through my lifelong experiences as a writer and a researcher of the quirky in all of us in my books and from my experiences as a life coach. And why quirky and not just quirkyalone? That is the subject of another post, but I’ll say briefly here that I have become more and more fascinated with the “quirky” part of quirkyalone as the diamond in each of us. And polishing that diamond does not mean being alone–it means sharing who we are and connecting with others in a place that is vulnerable and real.

Early bird registration for the first session of Get Quirky will open soon in the next week. I invite you to hop on this list to get the first work to register and for access to a special discount. I hope you will join me for a journey of 30 days of quirky.

My core intuition (and I am a pretty intuitive person who follows intuitions to lead my life, case in point this recent move to Argentina which is going very well!) is that this program will be both fun and transformative for those who participate (including me!).

If you have any questions about Get Quirky, drop me a line.

Like this? Share it! Sign up for my mailing list to get weekly inspiration for your quirky life. To get even more inspired, read one of my books Quirkyalone or To-Do List and join us for the next session of my class GetQuirky which starts in July 2013.

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